Here Come the Bridesmaids!

I've been holding back on a blog about my brother's wedding. Don't get me wrong, there was no shortage of material from which to choose: good food, old friends and family, new friends and family, lots of laughing and some happy tears.

But all weddings have those things. For the blog, I needed something different to write about. Something bigger, something bolder, something not all weddings have...

...like a pair of dating lesbian bridesmaids.

When my now sister-in-law Lindsay asked Tiffany and me to be in her bridal party, of course we were thrilled to be a part of the special day.

But after we were thrilled, Tiffany thought about the practical consequences of serving as bridesmaids together. She had been excited at the opportunity to match her shoes or some accessory to my dress, so that we would look complementary.

"Shit," she said. "Now we're going to actually match-match."

My friend Teresa said we were lucky that we got to spend the whole wedding weekend together instead of at different boy-girl/bridal party-non-bridal party segregated events. That's true. Once Tiffany was a bridesmaid and I was just her date and she sat at the head table at the reception and I sat with the photographers (when they had the opportunity to sit). All night long I told the waiters:

"No, she's not finished with that--she's coming back."

and

"He's having white wine."

Because Lindsay was a Good Bride, Tiffany and I weren't totally matching. The bridesmaids got to make small adjustments to the dresses to accomodate our different senses of style. Because I have no sense of style, I left my dress exactly the way it came--strapless--but a few inches shorter to accomodate my midget legs. Tiffany added halter straps so that we would look different from the bosom up.

Unfortunately, this did nothing to help the fact that from the bosom down we looked like conjoined lesbian twins. During slow songs on the dance floor, there was no way to tell where I ended and Tiffany began. We were one swaying mass of navy blue on two pairs of different (thanks Lindsay!) heels.

Still, of course we had a blast. And, the other bridesmaids didn't laugh (too much) when Tiffany took out an instruction manual on how to apply her eyeshadow or when they asked if I was doing my hair--which was still wet from my shower--and I said:

"I did!"