Some Thoughts On My Monday

My lentil soup spilled in my backpack this morning and got all over the soccer shorts I was going to wear during my morning workout. The soup miraculously missed, however, the pair of short tight biker shorts I was going to wear under my soccer shorts. So I was able to work out after all. But I was wearing short tight biker shorts.

I made it through my weight routine fine, but the treadmill wouldn't stop beeping at me. Beep beep beep, it kept beeping, flashing a little picture of a heart and telling me where to put my hands if I wanted to check my heart rate. Which I did not. Then it beeped beeped beeped and, morning of miracles, displayed a heart rate. 161. 171. 178. I have no idea whose heart rate that was. I wasn't holding the heart rate grips. Nor do I wear a heart rate monitor. I looked around. No one was running on any of the treadmills near me, so this heart did not belong to anyone I could see. So suspicious was I of this mysterious heart rate that I actually felt the elastic band of my sports bra wondering if I had inadvertently bought one with a built-in monitor. I had not. Beep beep beep, the little red heart flashed, as I continued to run. Occasionally it displayed the phantom heart beat, despite my button-pushing and under-the-breath cursing. Or maybe because of it. Perhaps my anger at the beeping had increased my heart rate to the point where the machine could sense my emotional state. The machine said: "whoa, this girl is really annoyed; let's show her heart rate even though she hasn't asked us to, just to be nice" (what I heard: beep beep beep beep beep beep)

This was not the best start to my Monday, lentil-soup shorts, short tight biker shorts and a beeping treadmill. Tiffany knows someone who is a Buddhist. He says things like, everything that happens was going to happen whether you were there to react to it or not. I think this means take a deep breath and don't worry if you're wearing ridiculous looking shorts because your other pair is sopping wet with last night's dinner. It's kind of like that prayer, "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." It's a nice thought, but we all know it goes like this, especially at 6:45 on a Monday morning: "Godd*mn this stupid treadmill."

PS-The lentil soup was great for lunch!